Why I Hate Being Called a “Fan Girl”

In light of the new movie “Fan Girl” featuring All Time Low (haven’t heard about it? Check it out here: http://www.altpress.com/news/entry/all_time_low_to_be_featured_in_fangirl_movie), I felt like I should really express why I hate the term fan girl. From my friends casually throwing the term my way to grown men pushing me at a show, I have never been one to take the term lightly.


Don’t get me wrong, fan girls do exist.

But really, don’t we all have a little bit of fan girl in us? Whether you and you buddies all jam out to The Upsides or you can’t help but sing along to every blink-182 that’s ever come into existence, you’re a fan girl. Being a fan girl isn’t a bad thing, it means you love a band and are one hell of a dedicated fan. Maybe you stayed up late at night listening to their albums while reading about the member’s personal lives. If you know everyone in the band’s name and get whole-heartedly ecstatic at knowing that their tour is coming to your city, you’re a fan girl. We all have those few bands that we would drop the world for, don’t we? The term fan girl is not bad. The way it’s commonly used is where it gets unpleasant.

It makes female fans look like a second class fan base.

When did loving a band become such a bad thing? It became bad when men walked into a venue and saw a crowd full of girls. It became bad when someone’s favorite band “sold-out” and their music started to “cater to girls” (to be honest, I don’t even know what that means). If success could be scaled to something as simple as a fan base, then I would say the more people in the crowd and buying t-shirts is better. Male or female fans, it doesn’t matter, the band is growing. We have the capability to reach out to our friends to find new bands, to follow bands on social media. The band was never catering to males in the first place. If you go back far enough, they weren’t writing for anyone but themselves. Instead of looking at a crowd and wishing that it wasn’t full of young girls, look at the success of a band and their ability to bring new fans in.

The label “fan girl” is demoralizing and discouraging to young girls.

Speaking of young girls in the crowd, be nice. It’s that simple. Welcome them into the world of music. If an adolescent girl feels like she’s unwelcome or in a place she doesn’t belong, then she will not be back. The success of bands is built upon dedicated fan bases, and men who think calling a girl out for being a fan girl is actually hurtful to both her and the band. Music communities are suppose to be safe places where you can make friends, bond over music and your shitty hometown. By telling a girl in the prime of figuring out who she’s suppose to be that she is nothing more than a fan girl is demeaning. Wanting to push to the front of the crowd is not just a fan girl thing, sorry to break it to you boys.

This is what is implied when you call a girl a fan girl:

  • She only likes the band because the lead singer is cute.
  • The idea that you think you know the band better/for longer making her opinion on the band less valuable than yours.
  • There is no place for her in the crowd.


To be honest (if I haven’t been already), I don’t have time for you if you think I’m just a fan girl.

I’ve pushed out of a pit during The Story So Far. The crowd at Four Year Strong wasn’t the most welcoming. At Bad Religion during Riot Fest, some guy maybe a year or two older than me asked if I’ve ever actually listen to the band. The amount of times I’ve heard the term fan girl thrown at me couldn’t be counted on my fingers. I will tell you the bands I’m a fan girl if you really cared to hear it (mostly Every Avenue). Love whatever bands you want. Welcome others into the community. I will hold my own in a crowd and have just as good as a time as any guy at the show. But don’t you dare think all I am is a just another fan girl in the crowd.





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One thought on “Why I Hate Being Called a “Fan Girl”

  1. This article is really good! Honestly there are many men who are just as obsessed with the bands as you are – it is not just women. Plus I’m a guy and get obsessed with bands too.


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